Self Awareness is the start to any Self Improvement.
We often seek self improvement and look at potential change after a significant life event. Divorce, a change in jobs, a birth, or sadly a death in the family can trigger the start of a change.
The more we understand ourselves, the more we can make changes to improve - this is especially true around confidence.
Where to start?
1. Approach with ‘I could be wrong about this… but’ - instead of being so sure about a situation - this shows people (as well as your own brain) that you are open and curious.
2. Take ‘you' less seriously - our thoughts and behaviours are brought on by what happens outside of us. People and situations affect the way we think. We are not right all the time. Own it.
3. Recognise your own patterns - do you start to feel anxious when you have to deliver a presentation? Do you get irritated when you are interrupted in meetings? Is there a person in your life that makes you feel less than amazing?
How do you behave? Jumping to conclusions without the facts, blame others if we feel insecure, doing things alone because we are afraid to ask for help, being insensitive, knowing it all, avoiding conflict, treating commitments casually- not valuing others time, conspiring against others, withholding commitment, not taking a stand, or tolerating ‘good enough’. Dig deep.
4. Don’t try to be something you are not - your ways, and your personality are part of you. If you try and be different - it’ll last a short period of time and to an outsider appear inauthentic. Take some steps to understand why you behave in the way you do.
5. Notice what annoys you about others - are these things you don’t like about yourself? Lack of vision, Disloyalty, Negativity, Sneaky, Too slow, Like a Doormat.
6. Identify the emotion that is like a bomb - the thing that happens to you that you can't get out of your head for a week, a month, a year - rejection, worry , stress, fear, impatience, anxiety, anger, sadness, loneliness, jealousy, shock, humiliation.
7. Ask for Feedback - Be brave. We all have blind spots because of our personalities, how we are brought up and the things that have happened to us. Getting feedback, brings the dark into the light.
8. Try something new - we are over-scheduled, trying new things - from changing your meals to visiting a place you have never been to before are great to challenge us and help us get in tune with our feelings, emotions and behaviour.
9. Know your values - do you know what your highest rated values are? Do you know which are most important to you - knowing these can help you make changes in your life that will be lasting and fulfilling. We seldom think about these things - but knowing our values inside and out can really help.
Now what?
This will be a long journey of discovery, but it's worth it. To get there quicker, engage a Life Coach who can ask questions you are scared to ask yourself and who will push you to try something new and help take the fear away.
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If you wanted to explore this with me or to ask more questions - book a free discovery session to see whether coaching is right for you.
Coaching is not a one size fits all solution and careful selection of a coach will mean you achieve your goals well and fast. There need to be a spark!
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